4 posts tagged “cohousing”

On the second day of my Christmas holiday, I trekked with my daughters to the Shell station two blocks away. Luckily I didn't need gas as they were completely out. The store sells bare essentials including chips, licorice, wine, milk and lollypops. I suppose we could live on that if we had to.

What struck me most about our little walk was how quiet the neighborhood was. There was a hush like you'd find in a small town. I felt friendlier to people, more than usual. Others were friendlier to me as well such as the older couple digging their car out along with their skinny shivering dog, the Ethiopian clerks at the Shell station, and the owners of a new coffee bar that is opening across the street. I think they just found their best customer.

Earlier in the day, I rode on the bike trainer listening to songs on the Pandora music service, parked in front of a snowy beach scene in SL.

Our cohousing community barely 6 years old is in need of many repairs from cracked stairs to broken chairs. At least that's what it looks like. A full report recently circulated complete with pictures and analysis. It's bad, somewhat bad. Bad enough that everyone's going to need to pay a little more. I haven't had much time to focus on cohousing issues lately. And my approach at a community discussion today was to listen rather than speak. I just don't know that much about maintenance and I can't justify wanting to keep my own dues low if it means the community isn't maintained.

We have some good facilitaors here. For the second half of the meeting, everyone got a chance to speak about their own perspective. One neighbor said he has pretty lax views on maintaining his own property and mentioned a beach house deck that is now "dangerous" but the standard for maintaining the community is much higher, he said. I have to agree.

Most everyone agrees that we need to fund a "reserves study" and an engineering study, take on repairs right away, and otherwise move foward in several areas. Some are worried by the difficulty of getting it through the cohousing process. Consensus is required or strongly encouraged but only up to a point. After two or three failed attempts at reaching consnensus, a super majoriy of 60 percent can make decisions. Consensus is good and an essential part of building communitiy and building teams; but the ability to make important long range decisions should not be held hostage to the veto of one.

I brought my dad's chili recipe to the cohousing common house Tuesday, completing another roller coaster ride as lead cook for the community. Preparing food for 35 people is no walk in the park, and I felt like I was in fast forward mode moving as rapidly as possible through the kitchen.  Maid was my co cook, one of the most seasoned cooks around here and a kind mentor. One of the first things we talked about was how it is different when you cook with someone else. It's collaborative. You don't have to do it all yourself. You have to delegate, and you end up needing to solve problems together -- like, where are the tortillas?, We've run out of chili powder -- now what? What can we feed the kids? It's too spicy--what do I do now? How to accommodate eaters who don't want spice, and so on.

The roller coaster got a boost when I realized my dad's recipe said "simmer for two hours." That is a lot of time in the Internet age. I had barely an hour left on the clock when I noticed this seemingly minor point in the fine print of the recipe. "What, you don't just heat it up?" I compensated by turning up the burner and fully cooking the beef before throwing it in the pot.

At 6, Brynnen showed up, as scheduled, and we couldn't have made it without her. She got the kids plate done, retreived the apples from the cellar, and otherwise really helped get us to the finish line.

When I checked the spicyness of the chili, I noticed the meat version was about right but the vege pot had some serious afterburner qualities. So I added three more cans of sauce and then a jar of red peppers. It didn't seem to make much difference:) Still, the vegetarians liked it anyway -- at least everyone but Jonathan. Sorry!

Overall it was a success. Here's what I learned:

• Find time the night before to check all my ingredients and corral non refrigerated items. Study that fine print:) 
• Check the list of people allergic to certain items. (Maid can't eat red peppers so it was good that I didn't put peppers in the meat sauce.)
• Prepare beans in advance, using dry beans instead of beans from cans. I think I could start a recycling depot from the amount of cans generated today.

Best of all though people really loved this chili, especially the meat eaters. Thanks to my dad for sending it my way. And as a bonus, I continue to amaze my wife for getting the timing just right!  

Well, it was quite a week. My post Sunday, "Scaling the Summit that is ZiggitySplit" helped get me psyched up for a week of experiential learning with the goal of becoming a more effective leader. This is a process -- not a state where you just settle into a gimmicky plan that quickly fades. Instead, I was glad to see the work we did around bringing greater visibility to what we are doing now, what we can do, and what we will need to do in order to thrive during a time of accelerating change.

More and more, I'm coming to realize the nature of this change and wondering what I can do to become more a part of it. It's about sharing and collaborating versus hoarding and going it alone. It's about breaking down old way of doing things. It's about standing up for what you believe and working out ways to effectively reach out to others. (Okay, I know that sounds sort of grand so maybe I also just mean, "hey, I'll loan you my car every now and then so you don't feel like your family needs to get a second car like we did".:) But joking aside, there is a profound power in community and what can be achieved.

I was gratified to be in a group this week where almost everyone walked out feeling renewed, more hopeful, and confident than before. We were encouraged to leave with commitments to continue this learning, strengthen connections formed at the group, and join the wider community of alumnai. It's my hope that I can do so.

When I came back to my cohousing neighborhood -- Jackson Place Cohousing -- everyone I ran into welcomed me back and I was able to talk a little about my week. It was also really nice to be welcomed back and asked about how it went. This is starting to feel more like a close neighborhood. One person asked me if I was drained. And although it was tiring, I returned feeling just about the opposite.

I also have come to believe that being a part of this cohousing community, based on sharing, collaborating, and coming to solutions, is absolutely in synch with the accelerating changes of this time. Time to think big....